butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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