i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
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