Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
