Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
