South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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