Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
honey bunches of taint.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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