C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize