After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
