He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
