It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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