I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I booty called her while she was in labor.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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