Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Randomize
