i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
