I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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