For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Randomize