i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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