Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Someone came in the potted fern
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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