i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
