that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
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