I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
