My room smells like vodka and shame
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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