so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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