yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
