What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
