Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(515): View more from Iowa

This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?

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(908): View more from New Jersey

Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint

(203): View more from Connecticut

i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already

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(504): View more from Louisiana

This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.

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(903): View more from Texas

Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me

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(916): View more from California

Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...

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(770): View more from Georgia

I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.

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