Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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