If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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