we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
