I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
