i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
