plz talk dirty to me
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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