Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
