I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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