He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
They are going to name an STD after you.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
