This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Ketchup is God's man juice
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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