oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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