Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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