Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
