woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize