What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
