To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
So vagazzling was a success
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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