Betty ford says i'm here all night
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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