There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I need water and some morals
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
