Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Please don't give away my fajitas
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
