worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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