we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
