This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
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