He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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