She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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