I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
